Sunday, September 21, 2008

Middle Class Part 36: Issues Article 9; Federal Reserve, Housing Market and Financial Crisis

Let them eat cake: Normally I spend 2-5 paragraphs easing into the topic, but as I don’t have an analogy applicable to the duties of an entity I will not be able to completely understand, I may as well get right to it. Heck, until about two months ago I would have guessed that a Freddie Mac was something you could get on the McDonald’s value menu for a limited time. But I can guarantee I had made comments in favor of regulating the private industry long before the current push to rescue investment industry giants and did not have to read ten articles promoting that view to think so. I expressed the desire to have more regulation in the areas of prevailing wage, immigration, smoking in restaurants, guns, and free trade, among others and included fairly vague wishes to monitor the business practices of large corporations such as those currently about to cost us $700 billion in parts 8 and 21. People think that regulation would stymie the type of capitalism that is necessary for this country to thrive. On the contrary, I think that doing so effectively will let us have our cake and eat it too. THis is something that will not happen if one pays $48 for 24 cupcakes courtesy of a tight-lipped Byerly's employee who withheld the fact that marble cupcakes are about twice as expensive as chocolate. For the more accurate history of the cake line’s originality having stemmed from Marie Antoinette, see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Let_Them_Eat_Cake. Has anyone given credit to Cliff Clavin for having invented Wikipedia? It's a little known fact that the original idea for the Federal Reserve came from Mayan fruit bats.

Federal Reserve

Federal Reserve: I only vaguely know how important the Federal Reserve is to the economic futures of American citizens. I have read expert opinions by people who know much more about what a valuable service the FR provides. I've read as many articles written by those seeking to abolish the Fed as those defending the FR’s decision making processes. The debate again reminds me of John Stuart Mill's germane line: “In all intellectual debates, both sides tend to be correct in what they affirm, and wrong in what they deny.” I already used that one in part 28, but I think it applies here as well. To me, I feel toward the Federal Reserve the same way I felt after having watched “The Passion of the Christ”; it was neither good nor bad, it just was. We may have to put up with the Fed as a necessary evil. Wikipedia mentions that the FR is a “governmental/quasi-private banking system”- ahhh, the government (congress initiated, see the next paragraph below) and banking that closely linked is concerning- as Ron Paul writes- “the Federal Reserve policy harms the average American, it benefits those in a position to take advantage of the cycles in monetary policy . . . Federal Reserve policies also benefit big spending politicians who use the inflated currency created by the Fed to hide the true costs of the welfare-warfare state.” (See Ron Paul’s “Abolish the Fed” article delivered in the house of representatives on September 10, 2002 which also contains a companion piece about the gold standard- “Why Gold?” written by Lew Rockwell, a leading libertarian political commentator- http://www.lewrockwell.com/paul/paul53.html.)

Rockwell’s most telling contribution: “Most of the time, governments are pleased to inflate their currencies so long as they don’t have to pay the price in the form of mass bankruptcies, falling exchange rates, and inflation.” I know there have been millions of personal bankruptcies concerning the sub-prime mortgage mess, which was never properly regulated and the government and the banking/mortgage* industry stood to gain hundreds of millions of dollars in taxes and mortgage fees and now that it has failed the taxpayer is on the hook for bailing them out. (Keep in mind, I do not think it takes a genius to have figured this out; I wrote paragraphs 2-6 of this offering at some point in June of 2008. More importantly, Paul and Rockwell wrote their pieces in September of 2002.) I quote from a source that indicates the present reality of inflation given the overall state of the economy, (gas prices, food prices,** etc.). The Falling exchange rates component of Rockwell's article- ? I’ll plead ignorance, if I wrote now that exchange rates were falling and tried to justify why, including that the Federal Reserve was responsible, when this blog diatribe is published and read by all English speaking peoples on the earth, I will look like an idiot if the Dow and Nasdaq are up significantly. Next week, the fourth week in September 2008, congress will be rescuing those that are too big to fail. The FR cannot be blamed for all of our problems and I don’t need an expert to tell me that. Congress was wise to get out of the market business, contracting this obligation to the FR. Rockwell concludes- “What keeps the gold standard from becoming a reality again is the love of big government and war.” His comments on the gold standard can be digested at your leisure and it is slightly off topic for me to get into that here. He refers to big government and war, which are traditionally, and respectively, considered a democrat’s and republican’s most representative areas of junta-ness/expertise.*** Now, after reading the pros and cons of the FR, it seems that the FR is at least one entity which seems economically detrimental to the middle class which may need to remain.

Inconclusive detriment: I am willing to forego an attack after the truth on such an entity because it is not obviously at fault for as many forthcoming middle class woes as some already identified institutions, policies, or governmental policy makers. However, as a government entity it must clearly bear some responsibility for the rampant regulation-phobia that keeps millionaires up at night. I find it amusing in the forthcoming general election season that both parties will issue their partisan rhetoric blaming the other party and do as Jon Stewart said at the end of his interview with Richard Clarke on the Daily Show in late May 2008- “abdicate responsibility while usurping power” kind of like Le Bloc Quebecois and the neo-democrats (see part 29). I have a hunch that the FR does about as much good as it does harm; in case you haven’t noticed, I do not have the same hunch about much of the rest of the agencies the government has rendered or installed to assist in our successes or to hasten our failures. So being, because the facts concerning the Federal Reserve’s potential financial detriment to the country at large are inconclusive, I would rather spend my words of frustration poking angst and fun at other issues in an effort to see that they are improved. Of course, I have less chance of actually improving those conditions than of convincing a bald eagle to get plugs or a hissing cockroach that routine rhinoplasty is not something that only grey, mammoth, large-horned, small-brained, odd-toed ungulates prevalent in Africa and southeast Asia can have performed on an outpatient basis, but it will be fun to give it a go.

In the old days: The United States has always had a central banking system and the Federal Reserve is just the third iteration. Anyone can read about the “financial panics” which “renewed calls for a centralized banking system” in 1907 (a call not answered until 1913, during Woodrow Wilson’s presidency- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Federal_Reserve. So, we saw the need to create a central banking system in order to avoid central panics. Economic historians will tell of the 1929 stock-market crash, the Dow Jones failure of 1989 and the economic recession of the 1970s. So, it is clear the FR is not blameless. The link tells of then “Senate Republican leader and financial expert Nelson Aldrich” and executives representing many of the most wealthy bankers at the time, who “secluded themselves for 10 days at Jekyll Island, Georgia.” That sounds like it is all on the up and up- politicians and rich men all go to Jekyll island and hide. The “Aldrich Plan . . . was derided by southerners and westerners who believed that wealthy families and large corporations ran the country and would thus run the proposed National Reserve Association.” I must admit, the various quotations included in the link are enough to make me sick, because it shows in what ways the less wealthy are powerless to combat the omniscience of greed. As I do not have evidence to the contrary, despite Milton Friedman having said that “the most pressing [economic problem of the day] was how to get rid of the Federal Reserve.” (a quote which is contained in the link above). On that matter, in addition to many others, I would defer to Friedman. I began in parts 1 and 2, detailing how difficult it would be to prove a number of things. Attempting to prove that the Federal Reserve is more responsible for the forthcoming economic position of the middle class than are immigration, taxation or campaign finance would be difficult.

George Will and borrow and spend: George Will’s April 19, 2008 article “Can We Survive Mission Creep at the Federal Reserve?” is a bulwark of an unsound argument which makes a blanket statement of all those in the middle class. (www.startribune.com/opinion/commentary/17924569.html) Will writes “Having maxed out many of their 1.4 billion credit cards, between 2001 and 2006 Americans tapped $1.2 trillion of their housing equity. Business Week reports that the middle-class debt-to-income ratio is now 141 percent, double that of 1983.” It is not the FR’s specific obligation, nor the government’s generally, to save people who put themselves in economic peril by assuming debts in excess of their income. Will is brilliant and most of the time I can even understand him. He seems to be advocating a FR laissez faire approach, which would allow the market to correct itself without intervention from the FR, without Americans exhibiting our famous economic anxiety, which causes more fiscal problems than it corrects. I had to again write to the same local radio host that had callers voicing their opinions on irresponsible middle class debt-mongers who complain about their own financial woe which they have caused. I would refer readers to the fact that my household pays off each credit card bill the month it is due so that no interest can accrue. I am not mortgaging my future, nor my children's, for expensive vacations or possessions, or writing checks that I cannot cash. I may be in the middle class minority when it comes to a debt-to-income ratio, and being so, can continue to justify my economic foresight of the tenuous ground even responsible middle class citizens tread now which will only worsen in the future. Again, food prices, gas prices, health care, education, prices on necessary cost items and taxes aren’t getting any easier to swallow given the limited cost of living increases middle class workers have been receiving. So, the argument that ALL middle class citizens are economically their own worst enemy will continue to fall on deaf ears.

“McCain Warns Against Big-Government Aid Amid Housing, Credit Crisis”: This Boston Globe article from March 26, 2008 contains some good and some bad news. The good news- “Any assistance for borrowers . . . must be temporary and must not reward people who were irresponsible at the expense of those who weren't.” Now who could disagree with that? Of course, let us consider- “Government assistance to the banking system should be based on solely preventing systemic risk that would endanger the entire financial system and the economy.” You could not have foreseen the practices of the mortgage industry which made all of the home-lender vultures rich? The government has the reaction time of a heavily-sedated lesser flamingo. Conservatives love the free-market, to which mortgage industry giants like Freddie Mac and Fanny Mae will be returned after being for a time, government sponsored foster children. While the damage had already been done, perhaps the government should have acted more quickly into the dealings of the aforementioned companies that held nearly half of the nation’s mortgages. This is a massive, massive strike against the unregulated free-market. Luckily, the government does not have a peregrine falcon for a pet; imagine what a bird that flies at about 200 miles per hour could get away with under their consenting eye. My proposal- the government should have a hand in the mortgage industry, with more regulations, perhaps not permitting as many banks to authorize loan amounts to homebuyers that the rest of the taxpayers cannot afford. If they more adequately regulate such business entitities, I will promise not to reference as many bird types in order to communicate government’s imperfections. But what can a Bush administration expect when a headline like “Bush to Relax Protected Species Rules” headline comes across my desk? The leading paragraph- “The Bush administration . . . plans to let federal agencies decide for themselves whether highways, dams, mines and other construction projects might harm endangered animals and plants.” Shockingly, “Developers welcomed the plan, while environmentalists derided it.” Next you will tell me that birds of prey love meals consisting of small rodents. A picture of an eagle, a species protected for the last 35 years by scientists, appears prior to the text of the article, and he looks pissed.

No treacle: Apparently George Will and my favorite conservative Echo Narcissists think that the more they whine about “it is what it is” economic conditions of the middle class the more they are serving the public good with tough love. The poison of this position is the attempt to manage the expectation of those who have worked hard enough to feel secure. The treacle/cure to this position is that plenty of those in the middle class, have earned the right to enjoy some of life's offerings (assuming they have not been charging televisions, furniture, vacations, and automobiles they cannot afford). We should not be relegated to the eating of Ramen noodles and stone soup or be forced to wait in line at Cub Foods for day old bread. We too have worked hard enough to enjoy the fruits of our labor- cable television, a monthly, reasonably-priced night out to Applebees, etc. Grammar policeman George Will and the Echo Narcissists might do better to stifle someone else, say the state department or the department of the treasury.


HOUSING MARKET

Below can be found a number of articles which concern the mortgage mess we finally discovered we were in in 2007 and of course some smart ass comments concerning the articles.

1) The source: “Needed Intervention in the Subprime Mess”; Star Tribune editorial, December 9, 2007.

The quotes and comments: The Bush administration plan was “for a five-year interest rate freeze on some adjustable-rate subprime loans, 2 million of which were set to adjust to levels as high as 11 percent . . . [this is] “an acknowledgement that the subrime problem had become so deep that regulators had to step in to avoid an even larger meltdown in the housing market”--say one that might cause the bailout of secondary mortgage market lending giants Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, putting economic floaties on their arms until they can learn to responsibly grab billions of dollars from borrowers while we are the ones drowning and also taking over an insurance company like AIG- (See “AIG on the Line for Others’ Losses” Washington Post, September 17, 2008, Zachary A. Goldfarb and Binyamin Appelbaum- http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26752313.) AIG, in the article, has their hands in more cookie jars than some other Wall Street corporations failing just as severely. I would ask why a government that can tap phone lines, cannot regulate or spread more thinly, an industry’s investment opportunities (for such is the nature of the insurance industry, otherwise they wouldn’t take on such risky ventures as those described in the article) so that if one investment gusset plate falls the whole economic bridge can still remain serviceable. “ . . . the government is telling investors in U.S. mortgages—those who actually own the loans after the banks sold them as securities—that they’ll have to settle for less interest income. That’s no the kind of signal the markets like to receive.” Awww. I would like to follow with the comment that the government tells the taxpayer things all the time that we don’t like to hear, but they don’t. They tell us that “the fundamentals of the economy are strong,” (McCain) that they’ll only tax the rich (Obama), that we’ll all have jobs, that health insurance costs will not rise, that we’ll pull out of Iraq and that cheese doodles wrapped in spider webs have some nutritional value. What is worse, we believe that someone’s promise is a solemn oath not to disappoint. When a friend says that she’ll pick us up at 7:15, we expect them to show up reasonably close to that time and we feel let down if they cancel on us. Politicians let us down all the time and we keep voting for them and they are more responsible for our lifestyle than whether we make it to Baker’s Square for a slice of pie and some coffee. I may have used a similar analogy elsewhere, but since no one is reading what I write anyway, I figure I can go back to the dry well without anyone feel as if they have been cheated.

2) The source: “Recession Fears After Housing Bubble Burst”; Alec Klein and Zachary A. Goldfarb, Washington Post, June 17, 2008.

The quotes: “After years of giving out mortgages to millions of people with less-than-stellar credit histories, lenders were imploding as subprime borrowers defaulted on their loans. The contagion spread quickly to Wall Street, which had packaged those risky loans and sold the securities to big investors in the United States and around the world.” The whole of the story is how news of a crashing mortgage industry has affected various investors with the realities of market conditions.

Comments: You catch a break- none.

3) The source: “White House Plan Offers Little Foreclosure Relief”; John W. Schoen, MSNBC.com, March 31, 2008.

The quotes: “The White House has opposed measures that would ‘bail-out’ borrowers losing their home or the investors who bought securities backed by their mortgages.” You can bail out some of the borrowers some of the time and extricate most of the borrowers none of the time, but you can rescue some of the loaners most of the time.

Comments: ‘Tis true, the government is reportedly not bailing out all of the mortgage lenders to the rejoicing of taxpayers everywhere, but you are bailing out some of them, to the disgust of taxpayers everywhere. There is such a thing as an Oversight Committee at work somewhere within the corridors of Washington no? Perhaps we should sanction the expansion of their duties via a referendum. Yes, and methinks it was Polonius (from Shakespeare’s “Hamlet”) who saith:
"Neither a borrower nor a lender be;
For loan oft loses both itself and friend,
And borrowing dulls the edge of husbandry."

Which, of course, I take to mean- that wives should not loan out their husbands to friends. So there you go.

(Note: in this article is also contained this information, common knowledge among people who have followed the demise of the investment and mortgage market much more closely than I have: “Since the financial markets began to come unwound last summer, the government’s primary response has come from the Federal Reserve. After a series of fairly tepid interest rate cuts failed to stem the turmoil, policy makers responded with increasing urgency, culminating in a $30 billion pledge to shore up Bear Sterns after a flight of investor capital pushed the firms to the brink of collapse.” I didn’t include the Federal Reserve in this post for nothing.)

4) The source: “Campaigns Have Deep Ties to Mortgage Giants”; Jonathan Weisman, Washington Post, July 16, 2008.

The quotes: “When Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac’s stock prices plunged and rumors of their insolvency swirled, the presidential campaigns of Sens. John McCain and Barack Obama released terse statements about the mortgage giants, then went nearly silent.” Shocking. I guess I could have saved that for the comments section. “ ‘. . . actually saying what has to happen next is a little bit scary if you’re in a campaign, especially if some of your most prominent supporters have such deep ties to these entitities” said a senior research fellow at what the article identifies as “the conservative Heritage Foundation.”

Comments: Anyone who thinks that Obama is some truth-wielding knight-errant who is poised to upset the political status quo and McCain is some former Maverick (ala Darth Vader) ready to realign with his cavalier past, has fewer synapses coursing through their brain than this statuette of Jiminy Cricket I have staring at me from my desk. Jiminy, symbol of conscience, nagging arthropod- quite a fellow- John McCain and Barack Obama- not so much. Some people can make others feel guilty for “wasting” their vote on an Independent; I have been unable to make some other people feel guilty enough for wasting it on either of this election’s “appealing” choices. Both men are too beholden to the major industry magnets that pay them. If the rich are paying them their salaries, (go look up total campaign contributions and the sources please) who in the world do you think their agenda setting will favor when they are in office? Jesus people! By that, I do not mean that they will favor Jesus. The question was rhetorical; the definitive use of the name of the son of god was meant to express frustration. To illustrate the point- “Fannie and Freddie [have spent] nearly $200 million in lobbying and campaign contributions over the past decade, according to lobbying reports and Federal Election Commission disclosures. It has also won them plenty of protection from calls for greater regulation, less federal protection and even nationalization . . . that protection may be ending, Washington economists say . . .” Don’t count on it.

5) The source: “Communities Suffer as Foreclosure Rate Rises”; John W. Schoen, MSNBC.com, June 24, 2008.

The quotes: “ . . . local governments are coping with shrinking tax rolls, lenders are saddled with more foreclosed homes than they can sell and empty homes in many neighborhoods are being vandalized. [In Florida says one resident] ‘lots of homes have been abandoned by their owners, and many people are going into bankruptcy . . . Whole condo projects sit half-finished and rotting in the Florida sun. On some streets almost half the homes are empty. Many people have lost 40-50 percent of the value of their home.’ ” The remainder of the long article catalogues the condition of nearby parks, the abandonment and damage to homes, sometimes by the former tenants, the lack of pride in ownership, plywood barricades preventing further damage, the silence in communities hit hard by the mortgage crisis. One Indiana woman writes: “ ‘Our local government is planning to demolish vacant homes [which will] cost the city more money, which in turn creates more tax burden for South Bend’s residents. It is a vicious cycle.’ ”

Comments: But calm down. Our next president and the next congress will fix all of that, because they said they would. They will appoint some magic fairy to resolve the economic issues of our day, feed us bon-bons and provide us with butt-pillows. I have included all of these articles about the mortgage crisis as an element of an economic factor that in fact does affect a large number of citizens generally and more specifically- middle-class citizens. FYI- try focusing on funding for your retirement when the stock market is as erratic as it has been and while you are attempting to sell a home that is bankrupting you. An economic analyst on CNN the other day indicated that inflation is at 5.4% and that income increases were inbetween 3-4%. His most valued measures were food, gas and housing. All is well however, because if I can look at this issue in a vacuum . . . there is little else in this country that is economically alarming. That would be sarcasm.


FINANCIAL CRISIS?


Hurricane stock market: By the time I actually self-publish the contents of this book, the market could be back to normal. If someone could tell me what normal is, that might actually comfort me. I have been in a 401k retirement account for almost 12 years and it has not really been healthy in years, with the performance of investment vehicles having been stagnant for about 7 years. I do not like to panic. Sometimes the reason to panic is thrust upon you and only some annoyingly self-assured jackass would continue to tell you not to worry, as if they had consulted some kind of oracle that had guessed the future, or at least had a number of cardboard coasters to bridge the gap between a short table leg and the floor. “How to Clean up a Category 4 Financial Storm” Washington Post, September 18, 2008 written by Steven Pearlstein, briefly touches on the current global marketplace before summing up the financial panorama: “What we are witnessing may be the greatest destruction of financial wealth that the world has ever seen—paper losses measured in the trillions of dollars. Corporate wealth. Oil wealth. Real estate wealth. Bank wealth. Private-equity wealth. Hedge fund wealth. Pension Wealth. It’s a painful reminder that, when you strip away all the complexity and trappings from the magnificent new global infrastructure, finance is still a confidence game—and once the confidence goes, there’s no telling when the selling will stop.” I have little doubt that the Federal Reserve had to bail out the likes of AIG and the government sponsored enterprise FMs (Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac) among others, even to the taxpayer’s detriment. My disgust is centered around the very reasonable idea that there is no reason it had to get to that point. The same could be said for the “Saggy Pants Law” that a judge in Florida recently ruled unconstitutional. If young men would simply save some of the money they spent on Madden 2009, Halo or Guitar Hero and spend $12 on a belt, we wouldn’t have needed to hear yet another judge invoke the word “Unconstitutional” to defend some dumb-asses right to dress like a former prisoner.

Pearlstein writes: “Having pumped $100 billion in the banking system and lent $115 billion more to rescue Bear Stearns and AIG, the Federal Reserve was forced to ask the Treasury yesterday to borrow some extra money to replenish its coffers.” Who do you think the Treasury Department will ask for money?**** You still believe the Obama promise that middle-class taxes will not be raised? Is there any Kool-Aid left?

Risk and reward: All considered actions and words come down to one thing- the balance of risk versus reward. The financial industry is thought to have lived in that arena more than any person, entity, animal out looking for some drunken fun or caterpillar choosing which tree limb it should affix its cocoon to. The government was oblivious to the possibility of current market conditions? Really? Oblivious of this- some Wall Street banks “used their own ‘AAA’ credit ratings to borrow more money and keep the loans on their own balance sheets or those of ‘structured investment vehicles’ they created to hide these new liabilities from regulators and investors.” It is not good if investment corporations are more intelligent in the ways of subterfuge than your own government. I suspect they weren’t. The government, and the politicians that comprise it, have proven that when it occurs to them to be sneaky, they can be. It makes sense that corporations should balance their risk management along with their wealth management and be regulated in so doing; I think this and I barely know what I am talking about. I have to get new license tabs for my car, pay my homeowner’s insurance and buy a license to catch a fish. Regulate the damned financial industry! Regulate it! Regulate it! My son listens when I tell him to leave the injured dragonfly struggling to take flight or he gets dragged, sometimes kicking and screaming back into the house. The middle class taxpayers are constantly berated for their inability to manage their own finances, but the federal and state governments too often come nowhere near being able to manage theirs.

Spread too thin: It appears that those who got fat on the reward of securities purchasing, insurance holdings, sub-prime mortgage rates and other investments, even from the complete or partial acquisition of another industry giant, whose market prices were made more attractive by the government (i.e. Bear Stearns was acquired by J.P. Morgan) and the rewards to reap therein, were far too short-sighted concerning the risk of those endeavors--and the government allowed them to be; the financial industries were spread too thin, they had reached across too many investment aisles. Imagine that The Home Depot spent millions in advertising and start-up costs trying to sell roasted chicken or beer. If there is some crazy southern Home Depot that actually does this let me know and I’ll come up with another example. Am I to believe that a rabbit munching on some recently planted Asters has more fear of the revenge of the homeowner than a financial investment company or large bank has of the federal government? There are fourth-graders hitting on tom-boys in the shade of the giant slide at recess right now that recognize this dichotomy more than grown financial pimps whom the government enabled. There is risk that comes with reward. These financial corporations and our country should have learned that long before now and certainly now should be made to learn it, though it appears we can’t teach the financial giants a lesson without it affecting the economic midgets. It is to be hoped that when they are all back on their feet again, paying their CEOs $24 million for leaving their company that there was a contractual obligation pencilled into the contract to pay back the little man that funded their failure.
Too big to fail I: I keep reading about all of these bail-out packages, which I see as loans paid to an industry that the country cannot afford to have fail. How about a law that makes it Unconstitutional for a financial industry giant that is too big to fail be considered not too rich to pay back its debts. A bee with conjunctivitis acts more responsibly by pollinating a dandelion than some of the vultures who continue to hold onto their investment capital courtesy of the government. (Note- dandelions are reproduced without pollination and by most sensible people in North America- are considered weeds. Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson must be one busy guy, but a bit less busy if he doesn’t set up a loan amortization schedule; he doesn’t even need to charge them interest on the loan; see, our expectations are so low that we don't even expect you to play by your own rules.)

Too big to fail II: See Edward Lotterman’s St. Paul Pioneer Press, September 18, 2008, Business Section (C) column explores the fascinating world of identifying the conditions that would prevent large commercial banks or other financial institutions from failing. I had identified above, two of the three conditions he indicates prior to having read his article and the other is so obvious I am surprised I missed it. This does not mean that his word is law, but that it doesn’t take a genius to have considered a safeguard, especially since there have been a number of collapses in our history and in European history where the governments were not as educated on the symptoms of failure- meaning those responsible for the current iteration of financial industry failure had some precedents to consider. Lotterman’s list of three things to avoid in the future- 1) “prudent regulation by the Fed and Securities and Exchange Commission [to] reduce risk-taking and overleveraging” (had that one); 2) “government should not deliberately foster the growth of large institutions” (had that one too); 3) “let enough firms fail that the rest at least worry they might not be rescued.” (missed that one). I am disgusted with myself.

Conclusion and blame: I am not suggesting that the current administration is to blame for the present market conditions, because the current crisis, as many economists may tell you, originated in the too economically confident days of the Clinton administration and quite probably prior to that. I am also not suggesting that any and all of those admittedly rather liberal sources I quote from above are completely correct in their assessments of the economic situation as it stands. Though, I would mention that I was unable to detect a partisan quality in any of the articles- I would expect a backlash from liberals if the only guy I quoted was the helmet-headed, near relation to Cha-ka from “The Land of the Lost” Sean Hannity. What I am suggesting is that the politicians that run our government have avoided placing any restrictions on the financial market constituents that line their candidate’s pockets with campaign finance dollars. This, to me, is more obvious than the benefit of a robin having genetically inherited a world-class gag reflex for the purpose of feeding its young. Continuing to favor extremely minimal regulations could lead many more to adopt the lifestyle of those people who live in tent cities for reasons other than that they are in the expected path of an aquatic natural disaster/hurricane. I could, could, make an analogy between the gag reflex of a robin and our having to swallow the bailouts that will cost us billions.

Weak Constitution I: Anyone continuing to deify the Constitution’s ambiguous intent, particularly originating from the first amendment, for the right to donate so much money to the candidate of their choice who, it is only natural, can be expected to respond in kind with a returned favor that jeopardizes the freedoms of hundreds of thousands of others, can no longer hide behind the very Constitution that he thinks protects him. That approach sounds awfully like hypocrisy to me. Look at Amendments I and X in the Bill of Rights, the only two that could be construed as justifying the selfish, unqualified “rights” of individual choice- namely the giving of billions to fund a candidacy. The first amendment is comprised of a list of five rights—they are: freedom of religion, speech, press, assembly and the petition for a redress of grievances. I see nowhere in that sentence anything about the right to give sickening amounts of money to a cliché who will put it to no good purpose, forsaking some of the people who most need his assistance. The tenth Amendment is comprised of the most vague string of words in the entire Constitution: “The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.” Somehow that equates to—“here Mr. Obama take my $10 million and consider it a contribution in kind to be spent on your candidacy and in no way do I expect you to reciprocate with a veto of House Bill 10 which allows me to taser calves while I am giving them a flexible arm interest rate on a stall in a barn I plan on setting on fire.” Constitutional advocacy, when brandished under these auspices makes me sick; the greater justice is to protect the liberties of the many from being sacrificed by the wants of the few.*****

Weak constitution II: I do not find it a fit argument to say that all freedoms of this most selfish kind, that of essentially buying a politician’s vote, are protected under the direction of the Constitution just as a Flintstone vitamin does not protect my daughter from contracting the croup. Again, I am using deductive reasoning to figure on the probability of there being a 1-to-1 relationship between the money given to a candidate and his eventual repayment in the form of a favorable vote on the issue of the donor’s choosing. Barry Bonds is alleged to have taken steroids, and I believe he undoubtedly did so. Some, cognizant of what steroids might do for a player’s performance have minimized the effects on his overall production. My question would continue to be, why feel so compelled to take them if the results are so inconclusive? I am to believe, that billionaires with so much to lose, would gift millions in donations to someone from whom nothing is expected in return? Not even the collective intelligence of the dwindling pollinating bee commonwealth is buying that and it is fall, when they have far fewer flowers to visit and more time to pontificate on such rueful complicit bastards.

Keep in mind: Two things- 1) the original Constitution contained provisions allowing slavery to continue for the next twenty years- a much greater violation of individual freedoms than today’s dross of conservatives and liberals whining about campaign finance regulations that aren’t even as effective as they should be; and 2) a document that goes by the name of The Declaration of Independence, which predates the Constitution, in wide appeal, by 11 years includes this text: “In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.” The substitution of just a couple of words in that paragraph could make it applicable to our current predicament. Take out “Prince” and put in "oligarchical American government." And follow up the notion that we have formally “repeated Petitions” with “passive-aggressively petitioned” and the paragraph is completely appropriate considering the present condition of the citizens of the country. Is there an author among us who might suitably, deliberately and successfully write our government's representitives for the economic amelioration of the middle class, so that they cannot deny us that for which we have formally requested?

Short-selling your individual liberty: From the article- “SEC Imposes Emergency Ban on Short-Selling” from the Associated Press, September 19, 2008, (http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26785712/) I learned that short-selling is the practice of “borrowing a company’s shares, selling them, and pocketing the difference when the stock fails.” Those borrowing shares are hoping that the company’s stock fails. That is how they make money. There is even a practice in the investment industry call “naked short-selling” which has nothing to do with pre-conditions of deciding whether to get naked with a member of the opposite sex, based on your expectations of how attractive they are without any clothes on. One question for those Constitutional law folks who think that the individual freedom to do anything you want, while restricting others from realizing their liberties . . . wouldn’t the ban on short-selling be a ban on one's individual liberty? It was ordered as a measure to protect the delicacy of the stock market. Conservatives, and certain liberals for that matter, who also favor deregulation, must think they are novice magicians; they distract our attention from the area where a surprise is forthcoming, and when our gaze is set back upon that spot, nothing of substance is revealed. Again, republican lenders as well as democratic ones are to blame. The problem is not party, but is rather money related. We will be no better off under Obama than under McCain. I plan to make my vote matter by not voting for either the guy who admits the economy is not his strong suit, nor the guy who criticizes that man with no workable solution of his own. Lucky for us, the financial industry is the only economic area this country has to focus on . . . (riiiiiiight- see next time).
CEO salaries: I wrote back in part 11 (October of 2007) that it was obvious that the excessive CEO salaries were one factor that was to the detriment of the middle class because it took money away from those who on a daily basis, it could be argued, are at least as responsible for a company's success as is a CEO and less to blame when it fails.
PS: A local conservative Echo Narcissist (Jason Lewis of 100.3 KTLK) actually maintains that the entire demise of entities like Freddie Mac and Fanny Mae, and thus the whole economic crisis, is the fault of the democrat. They, according to Lewis, are the party that encouraged the aforementioned companies to write more junk loans and to take on more mortgage debt and have been the party that has exclusively benefited. He feels that the whole mortgage debacle is not a free-market failure and is not a failure of rampant unchecked capitalism. Sir, if you are that incapable of approaching any aspect of the truth, perhaps you should help write for a soap opera, where your style of melodrama could really be appreciated. Apparently, no republican ever gained an ethically questionable monetary break considering the lack of regulations in the free market. People, the terms "capitalism" and "free market regulations" are not mutually exclusive. In order for our country to truly regain its economic health, which means that not just the rich should come out of this unscathed, proving that should be job one.
Reaction time and state fair rides: Considering that we've heard rumblings of severe distress coming from the financial industry, (for at least a year) perhaps we should expect our federal government economic experts to have a reaction time which at least matches that of a fake plant. This would still make it more progressive and prospective than Bill Gates' beloved and still iconic PC. The Apple/MAC ad campaign has been running for about two years and Gates finally must have realized they were eating into his monopolization of the computer sales industry. Using Seinfeld was a great move and I don't see anything wrong with that. One other concern is the reported interest of plenty of congressional whiners to pass a bailout bill which still leaves an uncapped amount of money available to CEOs, whether that is if they remain or depart from the bailed out entity, I couldn't speak to. If the proposition precluding exorbitant CEO salaries does not make it into the bill, I will feel even worse than I felt at discount state fair ride day. This day for kids, reduced rides that should already have been two tickets from four tickets to three tickets. Confused? I was too when I found that they charged the adults the same number of tickets to ride on a ride only a mannequin would find enjoyable for a duration of time that only a virgin having relations with himself in an outhouse at that fair could appreciate.
See, the state fair rides are just like the proposed bailout of billion dollar corporations. We "get" to ride along with someone enjoying the experience far more than we are (our kids on the one hand and billionaires on the other)- that is, if you consider the aspect of the proposed bill that would relieve bankrupt mortgagees of some of their debt off the bargaining table, afterwards we feel cheap and used, it costs us much more than you'd think, and all too often, the kids/billionaires liked the ride so much they want to go on it again.
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* Consider the Fanny Mae and Freddie Mac situation- “Not only are they too big to fail. They are almost too big to rescue. They hold or guarantee some $5.2 trillion of the nation’s $12 trillion of mortgages, backed by the thinnest wafer of capital, meaning their collapse would imperil the already paralysed American housing market. Yet as Joshua Rosner, an analyst at Graham Fisher, a research firm, points out, nationalising them, a stark choice for the government since their shares tumbled last week, would ‘result in a doubling of the federal deficit, a further collapse of the dollar and unthinkable implications for the Treasury’s cost of funding in the debt markets.’ ” See theeconomist.com- July 14, 2008, http://www.economist.com/finance/displaystory.cfm?story_id=11735141.

** Even the price and sales of Spam have gone up recently- “There's no sign of a slowdown. Food inflation is running at an annualized rate of 6.1 percent as of April [2008], according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics. The price of Spam is up too, with the average 12-ounce can costing about $2.62. That's an increase of 17 cents, or nearly 7 percent, from the same time last year. But it's not stopping sales, as the pork meat in a can seems like a good alternative to consumers . . . Spam sales were up 10.6 percent in the 12-week period ending May 3, compared with last year. In the last 24 weeks, sales were up nearly 9 percent.” (Courtesy of- Associated Press, May 28, 2008- “Sales of Spam rise as consumers trim spending”-
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24861341/.) Spam is canned meat . . . meat in a can . . . and it is becoming popular again because of the rising prices of a necessary cost- food. The last time Spam was this huge was when it fed the Allied troops during WWII. Ok, the article doesn’t precisely refer to that being peak Spam popularity. At this rate, this meat in a can may ration us through this particular economic downturn from a sustenance perspective. The rising popularity of canned meat in 2008 . . .; what’s next, the rising cost of a vacation in a jar? The economy is even hitting the birds hard. A friend mentioned she is paying nearly $18 for a bag of seed these days, up almost $8 from last year.

Also, food prices/groceries are up 5% overall since the spring of 2007 (courtesy Star Tribune opinion article which appeared on April 26, 2008, by Allen Levine). As Levine writes, considering we spend 10% of our income on groceries, that 5% increase on last year’s $100 a week, cost us $105 a week in 2008. That is $260 increase for the year. If I received a 3% raise, and gas, food, property taxes, diapers, child care, college tuition and health care all went up 5%, my pay raise would actually amount to a pay cut. See,
http://www.startribune.com/templates/Print_This_Story?sid=18184719. Not convinced? Would you like another source? Ok, see the July 7/14th (2008) Newsweek inset on page 57 revealing that milk and bread were up 15%, and eggs up 26% since a comparable period in 2007. Rice, corn, orange juice , apples, chicken and ground beef are also up more than the average person is going to NET from their pay “raise.”

*** It is important to keep in mind that many congressional democrats supported the Bush administration’s interest in going to war with Iraq, despite what many liberals might contend; similarly, it is preposterous to lay all of the blame on democrats for the reality of big government. Thinking this would require one to prove that only democrats ask for earmarks in state or federal legislative bills and that only democrats benefit from taxes collected from the working people who have earned their money. Conservatives—good luck with that.
**** That’s right- “President George W. Bush, flanked by Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson and Federal Reserve Chairman Ben Bernanke, acknowledged that the program will put a ‘significant amount of taxpayer’s money on the line.’ ” Paulson contributed: “ ‘As we all know, lax lending practices earlier this decade led to irresponsible lending and irresponsible borrowing. This simply put too many families into mortgages they could not afford.’ ” (See- “Government Plans Bold Financial Rescue” Associated Press, September 19, 2008- http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26787984/. Paulson has only been the treasury secretary since 2006 so he could have had no foreknowledge of the market conditions that have brought about these necessary bail outs. Not quite so; he was “President and Chief Executive Officer of Goldman Sachs, one of the world’s largest and most successful investment banks.” (see Wikipedia). He is a true industry insider whose soul was purchased in a leverage buyout by his greed gene. If the idea of regulatory measures to check the greed of the rich ever crossed his mind, they were soon put to death. He is estimated to be worth more than $700 million; any chance he would put middle class interests above those he has served for more than 34 years. He worked for former president Richard Nixon underling John Ehrlichman for two years—do the words conviction of conspiracy, obstruction of justice and perjury mean anything to you. Enough said.
***** Here, I may have been influenced by Star Trek II- The Wrath of Khan- hey, at least I admitted it so that I might embrace my shame.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Middle Class Part 35: Issues Article 8; Education and the Gordian Knot and V. P. Vetting

Nice shot: In the movie classic “Man Who Shot Liberty Valance,” Ransom Stoddard (played by Jimmy Stewart) teaches a class of people (class- i.e. lower class/collection of people/hunyucks) how to read and write, but first he taught them about the U.S. Government. In a rustic, western, one-room school an indelicate senior class member is asked to summarize what she’s learned about politics, which crudely consists of her standing and saying that the people are the boss and “if the big shots in Washington don’t do like what we want, we don’t vote for them, by golly, no more.” The speech is not what inspired me to cast a more meaningful vote of conscience in the interest of what is right in the long run than a lazily and predictably defeatist vote cast for one of the two major party candidates that will be promising all kinds of things they cannot deliver. It was too much 1940s Hollywood tripe for that. But, I would think that some people who still have trouble figuring out how to work a can opener were stirred by that speech and probably thought that either Obama or McCain, depending on their natural political leanings, adequately volunteered ideas for issue resolution during the respective conventions. These people can be summed up in one word- idjits.

The wasted vote: What concerns me is that the disaffected, with but half their conscience remaining out of the casket of political elitism, cannot follow my un-entrenched mutinous logic. We are not stealing someone else’s car here folks. We are deciding how we shall spend our own gift card money on something we should suspect will not fit us four years from now- some of us are just too brainwashed to realize it. A colleague tried to demonstrate that voting is like archeology, whereby we are judged by the voting record fossils we leave behind, like a ride on a see-saw where a side must be chosen, or like a tug of war. His tug of war supposition was that a side must be chosen and that each person must strain to pull the other side into the cesspool in the middle. In my brand of the event, there is nothing in the middle but a well-heated pool of water and a set of Independents already wading therein as judges. Behind both the democrats and republicans is a pit of mud dug before the Independents jumped into the middle. The two sides strain to defeat the other with both sides leveraging their weight in vain, seeking to gain ground, in effect, by backing up. Meanwhile, the defiant, deliberate and inventive Independent produces a pair of scissors and cuts the Gordian Knot* which holds them together. Both parties fall back into the pit of mud and the Independent is the improbable victor for not having engaged in the nonsensical contest to begin with. The benign Independent has found a way to succeed, because of the shortsighted and ineffectual duo.


The wasted vote II: Actually, most unenlightened voters use their vote like it is some sacrosanct weapon they intend to unsheathe before the eyes of St. Peter, who may judge the merit of their existence because they didn’t break the ungodly “wasted vote rule.” Wield your vote as if it is the best thing to do at the time and maybe for generations to come. Traditionally, a pen of sheep considering how to defeat the wolf, show more independence and originality than the average voter. I feel compelled to reiterate, in a presidential election which features a republican candidate, John McCain, that not too many conservatives were happy with after the primary season and a democratic candidate, Barack Obama, that has offered no new ideas, but plenty of platitudes, voting in another manner should come more easily.

Eat your vegetables: Voting independent is only good for you if you do it- much like actually eating the fruits and vegetables that you were healthy-minded enough to bring home from the produce department of the grocery store. You can’t gain nutrients if they are stored in a zucchini rotting in your crisper.

Education short: I read somewhere a comparison of the United States with Uganda in terms of how much 1 dollar of education money actually get to the classroom- 3 cents in Uganda, 60 cents in USA. The day we are finding pride in that comparison is the day we should start medicating a loon for suffering through post-partem depression.

Calm down I: I know my opinion on the events surrounding the republican national convention and the conditions surrounding the current republican vice-presidential nominee are in high demand, but I only have a few lines to spend. The riots outside the convention in St. Paul were directly attributable to hurricane Gustav. The republican vice-presidential nominee, Sarah Palin, has at least two unrelated ethics-ish investigations ongoing (for the dismissal of Alaska’s public safety commissioner for being unwilling to fire her former brother-in-law and because she, as a former Independent, was among a group of people that have, on occasion, sought a vote on whether Alaska should secede from the United States), etc. None of the nonsense we were made aware of is important. She just had a child that has Down's Syndrome, her unwed 17-year-old daughter is pregnant; her husband was arrested 22 years ago for drunken-driving (not last week); a dog she owned as a teenager stole a bone. Shocking stuff. Palin's immediate superior might drop dead at any time due to age and the idea that his head sits back too far on his neck has caused him to suffer from contiguously-swollen-cheek-syndrome, etc. are major factors for not voting for republicans?

Calm down II: You really want me to believe all that? Right, and a cow named Apple will successfully chase a bear from her favorite tree. Huh? See this Associated Press article from August 18, 2008- “Cow Chases Bear Away from Her Favorite Tree” http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26273923/. The word “chase” is a matter of opinion. What is next? Sheep bahs and inflicts eardrum damage on tarantula? There is little cause for concern because all politicians have ghosts in their attic- some have more or bigger ghosts than others. Is the desire to secede from the union that big of a deal? The biggest problem among them is the firing of the state public safety commissioner. And we all know that the ACLU is probably all over that one- considering how quickly they acted to empower some of those released the day they were arrested for displays of protest on the streets of St. Paul that were deemed confrontational. Just relax. Just keep electing public officials for the purity they display to the naive, the pomposity they display to the forsaken and the ambivalence they exhibit to the sheep, despite words to the contrary. You have a problem with the amount of time spent vetting the proposed republican second in line to the presidency? Sarah Palin’s counterpart, Joe Biden, has been a U.S. senator for 35 years and you would choose the democratic ticket on that basis, considering congressional approval ratings? And Biden was probably only chosen because John Edwards had an affair with a PAC-hired filmmaker. You cannot make this stuff up . . . well you could, but no one would read it. (Note: for two excellent editorials on the topic of Palin as the proposed V.P. nominee, see “A Bold Choice” by William Kristol of the New York Times and “A Reckless Roll of the Dice” by E.J. Dionne Jr. of the Washington Post.) The republican ticket looks better than I thought. Candidates can make all the promises in the world, but they cannot achieve everything they say they want to without help; I wonder how long it will take a republican or democrat to manage the public's expectations with some words of honesty. Please, someone- McCain, Obama, publicly concede that you cannot completely control how 100 senators and 465 representatives will vote. If any of them could state where the office of president is weak, it would make them a stronger candidate. Have they not invented words that might assist them in this endeavor?

I was going to stop there: The morning after Sarah Palin’s stirring and rhetorically effective speech, I was listened to a Minnesota conservative talk show. The Echo Narcissist conducting services was actually demanding that conservatives get on the bandwagon to flip the republican ticket from McCain-Palin to Palin-McCain on the basis of one 40 minute speech, 10 minutes of which consisted of applause. Usually, only liberals who think that whispering into the microphone is effective subtlety are that reactionary. When a conservative caller expressed to the host the sobering opinion that perhaps the request was hasty, the host acted in a manner equivalent to a little child who is made to come out of the toy aisle at Target before she had planned. The host dumped the call and said that “we don’t need that type of negative talk” or something very like it. My brain couldn’t process the infantile disgust the host expressed and the words he chose to express it at the same time. Mr. Morning Echo Narcissist sir- if your wife tells you to return the: “Redistribution of wealth sucks” T-shirt that you purchased on sale from Kohls will you pout and cry in the familiar manner of your fellow hypocrites or can you just deal with it should your desires not match each member of mankind? Conservatives are well-suited to the use of IEDs in political discussions; to the untrained mind IED stands for Incendiary Electronic Devices (or roadside bombs) and not Impudent Emotional Despair. This host, seeming more calm than most conservative windbags, was fairly subdued and able to suppress his tension by the use of a controlled, non-shrieking intonation. I was almost prepared to be proud of him. Sometimes I get the feeling that most conservative pundits and hosts (Limbaugh, Hannity, etc.) are so uptight that they would forget that a tension rod is a suspension stick, used in the bathroom to hold a plastic curtain and is braced between two opposing walls for the purpose of keeping droplets of water in the shower stall. It has little to do with a high strung conservative’s inability to get and/or maintain an erection that’s origin can be traced to their giddy school-boy love of chasing chimerical truth. Moving on to education. . . really.

Sibling rivalry: We were out to eat the other night at a local restaurant and I spotted a bug scaling the window outside. I pointed it out to my son as I identified it as a grasshopper. My daughter, 19 months younger, who has developed a not irrational (for a toddler) hesitancy in embracing most members of the insect brotherhood, referred to it as a “bud” (bug). My son then called it a grasshopper . . . my daughter then, in pre-pre-panic mode, called it a bug. This kind of fervent disagreement can lead to an all out throw down between them. They have been known to fight to the death for the right to play with inoperable flashlights and under-inflated beach balls or some other toy neither of them will know exists five minutes later. Such is the way with politicians. Some issue is escalated to the forefront by the media, current events, a natural disaster (it was speculated that hurricane Gustav could push gas to $5 a gallon if it was significantly destructive), the public or even by politicians (consider Minnesota congressman John Kline’s highlighting of federal earmark spending). The issue is discussed ad nauseum without a resolution, and then we all move onto the next topic and its angst-ridden life cycle. The discussions and suspected negotiations between the two major parties often feature one party that is more properly correct in detailing the certain features than is the other party. One party accurately calls something a bug and the other more astutely refers to the general bug as a specific grasshopper, with never a solution in sight.

Who is winning?: Case in point- during the primary debates, the Iraq war and foreign policy was a chief concern until the economy started to turn even more south than it already had been. The moderators turned their attention to the likelihood of Bush’s economic stimulus plan (which amounted to a mailed refund that cost the federal government how much to distribute?) and potential subsequent other options for assisting the economically downtrodden. When the 35W bridge collapsed in Minnesota, it opened up a nationwide panic concerning the probable structural unsoundness of thousands of bridges in even more extreme stages of decay. Not too much national media attention focused on that issue these days. The battle between the two major parties is mindful of a swing-set race between two kids at the park. One child claims he is winning when he is thrusting forward as the other child is swinging backward. The nationwide polls conducted in the aftermath of each convention are reminiscient of this swing-set race. The previous swing's victor, in the course of one-half swing, is now losing- as he trails the previous half-swing’s failure. The ultimate champion is a matter of debate every two seconds and it is fruitless to attempt to crown a champion even after they are done swinging- even if the poll numbers are influenced by the fury of a democratic or republican national convention. The two parties remind me of two old men who are unaware that hearing loss is tied to Viagra and have no clue that some dame is interested in an illicit sexual encounter because they are benighted in the ways of non-verbal cues.

Easily distracted?: When an issue hits, it is easier to distract concentrated orange juice, particularly in the past tense, but not by much. Voters are even much easier to distract- as they are distracted by the hope of change or someone's devotion to country, having served a fate in a war and a capacity in peace of which few could ever dream. I am thinking of McCain here, whose bravery is unquestioned. What I do question is the relentless, repeated broadcasting of his many feats of valor at the republican convention. We get it, you are a war hero. Now, HOW will you control the price of gas and food; HOW will you resolve the price of education, or co-sourcing/sub-contracting American's work out to dozens of other countries; HOW will you avoid holding the taxpayer responsible for the Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae mortgage debacle. When did America's foremost choclatier get into the banking business? I have interviewed old war veterans and researched enough to know that those with war-time experience are fairly non-descript when it comes to discussing their military fortitude and are embarrassed when others do it for them. I cannot believe that one's military experience is the single most important aspect of their character qualifying them for the presidency and cannot believe that the republicans, for the most part, restricted their speeches to the constant reminder of McCain's gallantry at the expense of communicating the composition of potential policy issues.

Last time: I began writing about education generally (the bug), with much of the focus on the unlikely prospect of future generations of middle class kids being able to afford a post-secondary education if tuition costs, loan interest amounts, the cost of books, and room and board continue to rise, while grant money dwindles (the grasshopper). I have a few more pieces of information to communicate in that area and will also touch on primary education. However, as to the latter, it will do me no good to harp on the inadequacies of the education system in terms of how horribly our fifth-graders are about knowing the state capitals or how deficient our third-graders are with their reading- for that- read Dobbs’ chapter (pages 157-172) “A Generation of Failure” in his WMC book. The reasons- the cost, in terms of dollars, cannot be measured at that point in a child’s life and I am very far removed from the first-hand experience of elementary and middle school. No one in this country ought to be satisfied with where we are in regards to our children’s collective primary education performances- should they be made aware of it, in comparison to the rest of the world. So, it would be a waste of time for me to spend four pages preaching to the choir. I will spend a limited number of words on non post-secondary concerns before re-engaging in that area.

Minneapolis school referendum: This election year I learned there will be a Minneapolis school district referendum- see the article written by Bill Blazar, which appeared in the Opinion Exchange section of the Minneapolis StarTribune on August 17, 2008- “Can Schools Improve on $60 Million Each Year?” Blazar wonders if the achievement goals (in terms of student performance) of passing a referendum of that magnitude will be reached. This question is asked- “Should students be required to meet or exceed state standards, no exceptions?” I have been a milk drinker for long enough to know that the milk manufacturers put an expiration date on the container for one very important reason- it often tastes rancid 2-4 days after it expires. Of course it is important to force educators to get students to meet state standards that is why they are set, but there are always going to be exceptions. Managing the reasons for those exceptions is in the best interest of the state, country and individual. You don’t ask a puma that is about to go to the trouble of dragging an antelope carcass up a tree if it is going to eat the leg that might be dangling over the limb upon which it rests. Have some expectations and follow through on them by being diligent enough to be your own hunter; expect to kill your own antelope. That makes perfect sense doesn’t it?

Referendum specifics: Blazar’s contribution to the specific grasshopper, ah subject (the proposed referendum) is fairly minimal. Lynell Mickelson, simply identified as a writer from southwest Minneapolis, which makes her no more qualified to comment on the proposed referendum than the cricket that wandered into my garage two nights ago before I could close the door. She attempts to answer Blazar’s questions. Blazar is identified as a senior vice president of public affairs and business development with the Minnesota Chamber of Commerce; Mickelson is married to a teacher- same/same. Mickelson writes that “A school referendum is like a colonoscopy. It comes up every five to 10 years, but you swear to God you just had one.” That good huh? Not quite. A colonoscopy is actually a much more pleasurable experience than a $60 million school referendum. And next time, I plan on buying the non-generic laxative concoction in order to prove that. At least you know that you will be on the toilet for hours feeling miserable for a good cause- colonic health. It is difficult for a proponent of a school referendum increase to demonstrate the benefit of it. In the history of school referendums I am not sure if one has even tried.

Referendum specifics II: It is not indicated in the article what the money will be used for. An un-itemized justification is a big problem if you are looking to convince people to keep opening their wallet. This isn’t a garage sale, where you’re bartering for a lamp. It is simply indicated that if the levy passes, Minneapolis will raise the amount of money spent on each student from $615 to $1,200 and where that would rank Minneapolis statewide. I rank Goofy among the most objectionable cartoon characters of all time; arguing on behalf of the side that would raise the ranking of something that is that rank doesn’t really convince me. If the levy is not passed, Mickelson, suggests that 350 Minneapolis school teachers could be out of a job. It seems, that Minneapolis could hardly afford that. However, if simply keeping the same number and types of teachers employed to work with kids who are annually achieving less is the objective, perhaps a $60 million panacea is not the answer. I would want to know what percentage of that increase is really going to school administration and bureaucracy and what will change if it is approved by the voters. Mickelson maintains that “It’s a problem to apply a business model to something as deeply human and complicated as kids, families and learning.” It’s a problem but it is part of the solution. Even education is a business- especially when you are paying $60 million and asking Minneapolis homeowners to pay $17 more a month in property taxes (for those who own a house valued at $256,000).

Referendum specifics III: Mickelson’s best argument is this- “. . . when schools complain about this stuff, they’re routinely told to quit whining, shut up and act more like a business. But you want to see whining? You want to see excuses? Try demanding fuel-efficient standards from automakers. Or tell Wall Street to shut up, suck up and forget about a bailout.” It is really hard to argue with her. And it is hard to wrestle from the iron grip of a 3 ½ year old the kitty piano toy that would apparently complete him. The educators, administrators and superintendants better start justifying that amount of money, just as businesses and corporations should be made to solve some of their own problems sans bailouts. The middle class cannot continue to supplement the mistakes of either and certainly not of both.

Education and business: I had, in part 34, remarked that school, even post secondary education, sometimes does little to prepare the future graduate for the work-force. This article- “Don’t Just Take Aim at the Schools; Work With Them” written by Charlie Kyte, which appeared in the Star Tribune on August 22, 2008 addresses that issue. Kyte writes about measurable goals such as allowing teachers to visit “businesses to see firsthand the skills your employees need to be successful,” and “create a media marketing/advertising campaign that will embed the belief in students and parents that obtaining an education will provide a better future.” Hopefully this is not the first time these types of things have been proposed. I cannot believe how disconnected it seems the institution of education is from business. It is simply ludicrous; we focused more attention on the medal count during the Olympics and more attention on who the respective vice-presidential candidates might be than on how our kid’s scholastic achievements are transferable to the work world. Kyte even mentions Blazar’s (from above) desires- that Blazar “wanted a demonstration of accountability from the school system” asking for the $60 million. That is a more reasonable request than a frog of a campaign manager telling his aquatic larval-staged underlings/tadpoles that when he wants them to focus on the swing vote, it has nothing to do with the highly sought after vote of toads who exchange sexual partners for fun.

Dobbs writes: “. . . we’re spending $8,287 annually for each child in our public schools. Thirty years ago, we were spending less than half that amount. The cost of education has outpaced almost every other economic benchmark for more than a generation.” (pg. 159) This speaks to my point about Mickelson (see above) not being able to justify the increased expenditure until we discover the root of the problem. To be fair, I don’t know that it is as simple as saying “we’re spending $8,287 annually for each child” when plenty of experts would dispute that total expenditure based on state, regional and school district discrepancies. If that is the average of all students in the nation, that is quite an important component of the sentence to leave out. This is something Dobbs doesn’t mention until page 162- “What people don’t realize when they say schools need more money is, first, how much we spend. It’s almost ten thousand dollars per child per year now on average in the United States. And people don’t realize that we’ve doubled per-pupil spending, adjusted for inflation, over the last three decades.” Dobbs goes on to write about a lack of achievement, poor graduation rates relative to the increased expenditure, etc. This would be pure speculation- but I wonder if the collected tax issued, or referendum money distributed, to the various school districts is being equitably rationed to the students with an overall concern for their performance rather than allotted to the administrators and the management of the student’s education? The departments of transportation are issued millions of dollars that the taxpayer might assume should be allocated to the building and repair of streets and bridges but is rather redirected to mass transit or to those with administrative responsibilities thereof. For primary education level administrators and superintendents, key in a Google search of “corrupt school administrator salaries”- I believe you will obtain some results.

For the post-secondary equivalent: “While top U of M administrators give themselves fat pay increases, they are hypocritically demanding clerical, health-care and technical workers at the U accept a meager 2.25% wage increase. With the cost of living estimated to increase by 3.5% annually (i.e. inflation), a 2.25% raise amounts to a pay cut!” Now, where have I heard about the cost of living increase not matching the rate of inflation before? “U of M president Bob Bruininks, who makes $450,000 annually (and gets a free mansion too!) just gave himself a 17.5% raise the next two years, on top of the $100,000 increase awarded him since 2003.” What else can we expect from the CEO-equivalent of a major university? (See- Socialist Alternative.org “Solidarity 101: Support the Strike at the University of Minnesota” Sept 5, 2007. I am not altogether proud of having to quote from an axe to grind source, but I confirmed his salary. Look up “Bob Bruininks salary” on Google. What is happening at the U of M is not uncommon among colleges and university adminstrators and is the essence of capitalism, so it seems. Hopefully there is only an indirect relationship between an administrator's ability to flourish and the bankruptcy of a set of smart, driven, middle class kids struggling to acquire marketable skills.

Education and business- Dobbs, pg. 162: “The state of school performance is all the more sordid given our huge education budgets. New York City spends $11,172 per kid in its school system . . . New York admits that only 40 percent of its education budget—which is over $16 billion—actually ends up in the classroom . . . The budget for the bureaucracy [and infrastructure] is bigger than the budget for actual classroom and teaching resources.” Washington D.C. schools “have deteriorated to the point that they had to be taken away from the city and put into the care of a congressional financial oversight board.” The link between education and a prospective future occupation is very real and it is high time we recognize that. Dobbs writes, “With U.S. corporations outsourcing technical work to cheaper overseas foreign labor, hundreds of thousands of high-paying, high-value technology jobs have been lost to foreign markets. Because of this, Americans have diminished incentives to pursue careers in math or the natural sciences. As of mid-2004, computer hardware engineers were experiencing 6.9 percent unemployment, and electrical engineers were at 6.7 percent.” So, if the tax money dedicated to education is not being spent on students, clerical or technical workers or teacher salaries, where is it going? I would rather go to second base with a disabled, skateboarding, Jewish spurred tortoise looking to get laid after ten years of abstinence than believe that the money funding education is being spent wisely. See- the Associated Press article “Turtle Finds Romance After Getting Wheels” http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26273919/. This article appeared the same day as the cow v. bear story above. Maybe the winds of romance were coursing through the air and the cow was just looking for some action. Word is, I’ll have some competition- “a particularly amorous 10-year-old male [tortoise] has been after her.” No worries . . . I bet she misrepresented herself on her Facebook page anyway.

Friedman’s take: I side with Milton Friedman in the area of education on more than any other sub-topic to date. Friedman devoted a chapter, “The Role of Government in Education” in his renowned book “Capitalism and Freedom,” to the issue of education. Friedman brings up a term he identifies as “neighborhood effects.” His description is found on page 85- “circumstances under which the action of one individual imposes significant costs on other individuals for which it is not feasible to make him compensate them, or yields significant gains to other individuals for which it is not feasible to make them compensate him—circumstances that make voluntary exchange impossible.” In short, the neighborhood (as well as city, country and society) obtains some immeasurable benefit by all of its members being educated enough to serve a purpose. I would have to read the whole book again, but I believe this is the only chapter in which Friedman actually condones subsidizing the less fortunate.

Friedman’s other contributions: He addresses a great many auxiliary issues of education, but I have, at least in this case, have prudently decided to forego the vetting of them in lieu of cataloguing them. How happy are you? He writes about the return on the investment of education, private schooling and the paying for such, misuse of vouchers/handouts, teacher salaries, the administration of distributed education money, contractual investments of capital/money on human beings and their future earning potential, the “perverse redistribution of income,” parents being able to spend money on what is valued by them, and collusion- wherein- people may “seek to collude to fix prices, whether through unions or industrial monopolies. But collusive agreements will generally be destroyed by competition unless the government enforces them, or at least renders them considerable support.” (Pg. 96) I fear that this is exactly what the government has done to this point, without any educational regulations in place for combating the excessive rates at which tuition has been rising and only recently have they addressed this at the collegiate level. See the U.S. Senate Finance Committee information in the U of M endowment money paragraph.

No competition = no opportunity: Friedman’s most appealing conclusion for my purposes: “Existing imperfections in the capital market tend to restrict the more expensive vocational and professional training to individuals whose parents or benefactors can finance the training required. They make such individuals a ‘non-competing’ group sheltered from competition by the unavailability of the necessary capital to many able individuals. The result is to perpetuate inequalities in wealth and status.” Thank you Milton; that is exactly my point.

POST-SECONDARY EDUCATION

Well-endowed: I tell my son there is no need to go after your sister with threats of death because you have some kind of origination claim on a set of 10 cent beads you picked up off the street at the Leprachaun day parade. My children’s relationship is like that old cow and bear story, which is not one of Aesop’s Fables (see above). Telling the republicans and democrats to reform the education system might be easier than calming down my son on a day during which he has not napped. A nice place to start to negotiate with the political parties is to make colleges spend more of their endowment money. Phyllis Kim, from The Tartan, writes that “only a certain portion of a college’s endowment can be used and invested each year. The endowment itself is comprised of money-endowed funds, with their purposes decided by the donors.” I can see why a donor wouldn’t want to potentially waste their contributions on tuition for students, no matter the academic’s qualifications, but if the reason for tuition hikes can be traced to infrastructure requirements, then the government should step in and ok that more endowment money should be spent by colleges and universities to shore up monetary infrastructure needs, such as the updating of a library or the building of a science hall. This would appeal to the narcissism of the contributor by guaranteeing a bronze plaque appears at the entrance of the wing or improvement they financed. The U.S. Senate Finance Committee, according to Kim, “aims to limit the [endowment] money colleges can avoid spending . . . [considering proposing a law] “that would require colleges to spend a minimum of 5 percent of their endowments on financial aid.” If the Senate Finance Committee authored, and congress passed, a bill necessitating the devotion of 10-15% of the endowment money on infrastructure, books and post-secondary classroom tools (like scientific or industrial equipment) perhaps the contributors would be more amenable. Again, this would, in theory, reduce tuition costs, making financial aid less necessary if tuition were reduced to begin with. Phyllis Kim’s article, from January 28, 2008, can be found here: http://www.thetartan.org/2008/1/28/news/endowment. She also writes this- “. . . the rising costs of gas, food, and other necessities have prompted many more middle-class families to look to charity for aid.” But I must still be wrong in my assertions.

The headline: “Equitable Pricing for College Degrees”, August 18, 2007; Minneapolis Star Tribune- Opinion Exchange section editorial- (http://www.startribune.com/opinion/editorials/11148181.html). The content of this story reveals that about half of the larger universities have some form of tuition hike that equates to the student’s having chosen a more expensive major- “substantial tuition differences from one discipline to another appear to be a trend . . . Last spring, [2007] regents of the University of Wisconsin-Madison approved a $500 per semester tuition hike for business students. And UW regents are also considering a tuition hike of more than $1,400 for engineering students.” As if middle class kids weren’t going to have a hard enough time paying for their college degrees. “Price-differential supporters argue that areas like engineering and business need additional funds because they cost more to operate. To remain competitive, they say more must be spent on professors, equipment and research than in other academic areas.” If tuition wasn’t already overpriced to begin with, I would agree with them. Somehow, the states better find a way to make a good secondary education affordable for American students.

Feel bad for the poor old colleges and universities?: “Robbing the Rich to Give to the Richest” Lynne Munson, July 26, 2007, Inside Higher Ed.com- (http://www.insidehighered.com/views/2007/07/26/munson). “Colleges and universities are sitting on a fortune in tax-free funds, and sharing almost none of it. Higher education endowment assets alone total over $340 billion. Sixty-two institutions boast endowments over $1 billion . . . the total worth of the top 25 college and university endowments is $11 billion greater than the combined assets of their equivalently ranked private foundations—including Gates, Ford and Rockefeller.”

Skyrocketing endowments: “Higher education endowments also are growing much faster than private foundations. The value of college and university endowments skyrocketed 17.7 percent last year, while private foundation assets increased 7.8 percent . . . most of the gain is a result of stingy, outdated endowment payout policies that retain and perpetually re-invest massive sums. This widespread practice results in a hoarding of tax-free funds.”

Hoarding: “For too long the government response to skyrocketing tuition has been to increase the size and number of student loans. Now the plan is to make loan repayment easier and increase grant aid again. But making it possible for students and parents to go more deeply into debt only encourages endowment hoarding and runaway tuition.” Only a squirrel employed by "Simon Delivers for rodents" after learning from an inside investment source that the company was about to go bankrupt because of economic reasons would be a more adept hoarder of someone else’s property.

Ranking of the necessary cost of education: “When asked to name an expense that is beyond their reach, people cite ‘paying for college’ more than buying a home, retirement, or anything else.” The reason- because after an education is obtained, and after employment is assured, because of the education, and some money is coming in, it is most directly linked with the ability to afford all of the others. I didn’t need an adjunct research fellow who works for the Center for College Affordability and Productivity to tell me that.

Article chasers: Following Munson’s article is a series of mostly qualified comments on the nature of her findings. One respondent chose to criticize her focus on the wealthiest colleges and universities gathering the largest amount of endowment money. This writer contends that plenty of institutions struggle to provide a quality education for the money they are gathering in tuition costs. Previously, I had found that fresh off of 17% and 13% increases from the state legislature for the next two years for state colleges and universities respectively, the University of Minnesota reported an increased endowment amount of $2.8 billion in 2007 (see next paragraph). If this is true, and the U of M ranked 24th among 785 higher education institutions, perhaps we should be able to withhold the 17% state budget increase we sent their way in 2007, perhaps sending state money to other colleges and universities that might not have faired as well in the endowment area. And, I don’t know, by law, perhaps we could prevent those institutions we overlook because of their endowment fortunes from retaliating through a tuition hike. This would all be reasonable and assist the middle class compete for the opportunities a college degree would provide. One article chaser asks (and believe me, I was drunk enough on the material included in the initial article) “Does Harvard really need access to Pell Grant funds at the same level that an inner city community college does?” Sure, if they want to start quoting employee-alumnists of the aforementioned college to compete with Princeton for the 'most strangely made point sans a sense of reality' honor. (See parts 25 and 34. Have I set the Guinness Book of World Records mark for most cross-references in a set of unread blog columns yet? Glad I could work in a non-beer Guinness reference in a paragraph headed by the word- chasers. Shouldn’t the fact that you are attending Harvard preclude you from gaining much of anything in the way of grants? My being enamored with Friedman’s “neighborhood effects” can only go so far. Again, someone other than a Princeton spokesperson could feel free to answer that question.)

University of Minnesota endowment money: From the Minnesota Daily, January 28, 2008 by Emma Carew- http://www.mndaily.com/articles/2008/01/28/72165198: 1) the U of M’s endowment fund reached $2.8 billion; 2) 136 letters were sent to “colleges with the highest endowments” by the U.S. Senate Finance Committee and “charged the leaders of the college to submit data and analysis on the number of enrolled students each year, estimated and actual costs to attend the school, information on financial aid, tuition increases, endowment management, investment management, percent of the endowment spent each year, and compensation associated with campus presidents and endowment managers.” Somebody pinch me. Any chance they will be doing the same thing to oil companies, businesses and corporations with windfall profits? This is a truly apples to apples inquiry; 3) Senator Charles Grassley of Iowa said “ ‘Tuition has gone up, college president’s salaries have gone up, and endowments continue to go up and up . . . It’s fair to ask whether a college kid should have to wash dishes in the dining hall to pay his tuition when his college has a billion dollars in the bank.” I am not concerned with a college student having to work to put himself through school (I did). I am concerned about how much the student owes after he has completed school. Just handing a student all kinds of money, without him contributing during his college career is not a resolution to the problem; 4) the reaction to this measure by the U of M, was not panic as it should have been. Earlier in the article it was divulged that “4.6% - percent of [the] endowment [was] spent by the University in 2007. This number is on par with the national average for endowment assets of over $1 billion dollars.” I would urge that the baseline is unacceptable; when comparing apples to apples, it is best if at least one of them weren’t rotten. More panic-inflicting demands need to be made by the senate finance committee.

More Princeton Logic: From a NJ.com article written by Ana M. Alaya, March 8, 2008 “Colleges' Big Endowments Raise Taxing Questions”** http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2008/03/colleges_big_endowments_raise.html comes a predictable rebuttal from that dean of ivy league college logic- Princeton. Robert K. Durkee, Princeton’s vice president and secretary, says “ ‘These institutions have managed their endowments very responsibly over a long period of time . . . not only to become the best institutions in the world, but to strike a healthy balance meeting the needs of current faculty and students and being prepared to meet the needs of the future.’ ” Healthy balance? Yes, in much the same way that my son would suppose that a meal consisting of equal parts McDonald’s French fries and cheeseburger is a healthy, balanced meal. Mr. Durkee, your salary would be? I was unable to determine Durkee’s current salary but churning up the wasteland of information from a Google search to that effect, I found that in 1997, Robert K. Durkee, [then] “vice president, public affairs, Princeton University. $147,000.” (See- http://161.58.97.168/199809/80923s02.html.) The chances that his salary isn’t 3-4 times that 11 years later, (considering a like-compensated University of Minnesota president is earning $455,000) with a promotion to vice president of the school rather than of just public affairs- I’ll let you decide. “ ‘It would not be good policy," Durkee added, "to step into that and impose a particular payout.’ ” I beg to differ. It would not be good policy for you. It would be an excellent and fair policy for students. But, considering the type of reasoning that seems prevalent at that institution, it may be best to steer clear of the reason arts. In truth, those who cannot afford Princeton, or any excessively priced college, should not be going there and should not whine about the cost. I have met too many bright, talented individuals who did not spend $150 thousand on college who, given as many breaks and opportunities, could mismanage any fortune 500 company of your choosing- just like the Alexander Hamilton-like highbrows do.

Average college: Considering the information contained in this article at Collegeboard.com- http://www.collegeboard.com/student/pay/add-it-up/4494.html a superintendent or administrator can become quite comfortable with justifying their brand of bureaucracy. I wanted to quote these numbers from an article making the case that education is now affordable to say nothing of how difficult it will be to afford in 16 years. I think I can do this using relatively little space. Their major point is how affordable college can be after being granted financial aid.

“about 56 percent of students attend four-year schools with annual tuition and fees below $9,000.” But only the rich can afford to attend the universities with the specialized degrees that will allow more students the opportunity to pursue their dreams- say perhaps in the area of biomedical engineering. That isn’t a major offered at Normandale Community college. Quite true, collegiate elitists, do not want just anyone sharing the byways of their college campuses- they are too bent on the prestige of self-homage. Not everyone can go to Duke, Yale and MIT unless they can come close to affording it. It is important to dream realistically and not expect others to save us. I think your average college is asking for too much in tuition. Subsequent generations of middle class students deserve an opportunity to matriculate without going bankrupt and deserve the opportunity to attend more than a public two-year college, such as 22 percent of all full-time students attend. What looks better on a resume- Dakota County Technical Institute or University of Michigan?

Granted I: This article (the collegeboard.com) reveals that “After grants are taken into consideration, the net price the average undergraduate pays for a college education is significantly lower than the published tuition and fees. And remember, other forms of financial aid will further reduce the amount your family will actually pay.” Do these people expect the financial aid fairy to descend upon the students who enroll at their college? The article reveals that Public four-year college is up 6.6 percent from last year- to $6,185 and that “More than $130 billion in financial aid is available to students and their families.” They can offer no words that connote guilt along with that poison, I sit here being long-winded in print, dumbfounded.

Granted II: One thing about grants- you have to qualify for them. How do you qualify for grants? You have to show financial need. Again, when I was attending a two year community college for four years, I applied for aid and was turned down. I was working part time, my mom was working two jobs, but had a decent amount of money in her bank account for a reason she would have given the money back to have remedied. I paid $100 a month in rent, so I caught a break there. I put myself through college. She paid for books one semester, because that is all she could realistically afford to do and I never questioned it. My point is that no middle class kid, living at home for reasons that ought to be economically obvious, will qualify for that Pell Grant or other financial aid money. Again, the poor and the rich are well-cared for. The middle class- not quite. In three different websites I went to where a potentially needy student could apply for financial aid, one from Maryland (Maryland Higher Education Commission), one from Wisconsin (State of Wisconsin Higher Education Aids Board- or HEAB generally), and a Federal site which “offered” Pell Grant money, to be found here- http://studentaid.ed.gov/, financial need must be demonstrated. Unless you are a middle class student already good at cooking the books, not being honest about bank accounts and then not getting caught, you are not getting any financial aid, because you cannot demonstrate financial need, at least not enough to satisfy the government. I would rather try to put a 500 piece puzzle together on shag carpeting than reason with these types of people.

One more: The other point addressed in the article is that “For full-time dependent students at public two-year colleges, net tuition and fees are no more than 2% of the family income.” Two things- one, b---sh-t and two, try attending a college without books, a car to get to college if you have a job off campus or room and board money if you have a job on campus.

Nice Times: David Brooks of the New York Times wrote an article speculating (prior to the announcement) that it made the most sense for Obama to have picked Joe Biden as his democratic vice presidential running mate. Brooks refers to another man I’ve never heard of as a potential choice for Obama, but dismisses him as having “impeccably centrist credentials” and then writes that “the country is not in the mood for dispassionate caution.” Mr. Brooks- firstly, the Kevin Costner movie that bears your name was horrendous, and secondly, I would enjoy the opportunity of getting into an adjective or metaphor war with you concerning how ineffectual your party of choice has been in the political world. Have I used the puzzle on shag carpeting analogy yet? Well, if they don’t feel the need to trot out any more new or useful analogies to describe Independents or centrists, I won’t need to waste my pathetic attempts at inventiveness on them. Seriously, I was about to make reference to a dutch belted dairy cow in the most unfavorable light in regards to their (the cows and the republican and democratice extremists*** for that matter) whoring after granny smiths, but I’ll keep at least one bullet in reserve.

Education desires: Two mandatory courses- 1) History of Culture- wherein immigrants and Americans alike must learn of the diverse ways of cultures other than their own- Americans would learn something about Mexican, Muslim, Islam and Russian, among others and Latin Americans and Hmong, Eastern Asians would learn about American customs and culture. This may help us be more civil to one another, and; 2) A high school finance course- where kids would learn about investing, balancing a checkbook and responsible spending.

“I love it when a plan comes together”: This was a line uttered by Hannibal at the end of each episode of the A-Team, an over the top action show from the early 1980s, when the team had successfully completed their mission. I’ll link this reference up in a few sentences. Endowment money and its allocation is a sticky problem. During some of my research I encountered a piece of information that revealed that if a donor wants the money he has donated to be spent on all things Greek, the institution accepting the donation really has its hands tied. The institution referred to in the article as having received the money was Princeton- so they offered more classes in Greek. See http://www.universityworldnews.com/topic.php?topic=World_In_Brief&page=7 and do a find on the word “Greek.” Alaya, from the NJ.com article, also writes that “College officials responded with detailed defenses of their spending, noting gifts often come with strings attached.” (Emphasis mine) Huh, “hands tied,” “strings attached.” Looks like I might have more need for a pair of scissors or a sword to cut this Gordian Knot.**** I love it when a plan comes together. Prior to the 2007-08 school year, Princeton raised tuition 40 consecutive years and with billions of dollars of endowment money just lying around, maybe it is time for congress to change some laws. Cut!


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* The Gordian Knot is used as a metaphor for an intractable problem, solved by a bold stroke ("cutting the Gordian knot". The whole story is very interesting and too lengthy to reproduce here in full. It involves (what else) a decree, a king, an ox-cart, an oracle, an ancient capital city, a peasant and Alexander the Great. Briefly, Alexander cut the knot with a stroke of his sword. Using a scissors is more modern, less aggressive and more scholastic (given the subject matter- the alteration is fitting). See Wikipedia for more information.

** There is a lot of information on the issue of endowment money and the U.S. Senate Finance Committee investigation of how that money is spent relative to the rise in college tuition and administrator salaries and I know that I have not done it justice. It is now September and the last source I quoted was from early March. I have no idea how the issue has turned out or if the Senate Finance Committee has been beaten back. It appears that nothing has been resolved to this point. This article- "Key Senator Hires Former IRS Official to Oversee Investigation of College Endowments is from April 8, 2008. The reason for this news is that the former senior counsel to senator Grassly resigned for reasons the article does not mention, though upon further digging it seems that former lead investigator Dean Zerbe was highly qualified and diligent in holding universities accountable.

*** To me, a republican or democratic extremist is anyone who continues to excitedly vote for candidates representing one of the two parties.

**** In addition to the result of education (a degree) being a Pyrrhic Victory, it is the foremost Gordian Knot issue. It is not alone among issues that could use their Gordian Knot severed; but I think that Alexander the Great would need help severing this tie that binds.